Christmas was wonderful. Much different with a little baby. Much better.
Ussually I stress so much about gifts, - this year I was too busy. The day came and I still felt my normal anxiety about "Did I buy enough?", but I was more excited then anything.
I enjoyed the thoughts of this new little person becoming part of my family Christmas traditions.
Everyone was so excited for her first Christmas, which made it even more enjoyable for me. It made me look forward to Christmas's to come when she will be old enough to enjoy it. I look so forward to seeing the expression on her tiny face when she rips the paper off her packages.
In the past few years I haven't concentrated too much on decorating our home - inside or out. Now that I have her, I see the importance. I want Christmas to be a big deal for her. I want her to wake up on Christmas morning with the smell of cinnamon wafting in the air, bulging stockings, presents under the tree and lights outside her window. I want her to believe in Santa and write him letters. It's funny how it isn't about me anymore. I used to search through my parents house for my presents, rip the paper and peek ( and blame it on the dogs) always wondering what I was getting. This year I didn't care.
The only gift that I look forward to getting now is the very first construction paper and paste card. I hope it has a big red heart with "Mommy" written inside.
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